Monday, February 28, 2011

Paper Tigers

"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward." ~ Amelia Earhart

I'm ready to step up and act. Take control and stretch. Grow. I'm happy. I'm hopeful. There seems to be this force that's taking me along with it. Ready or not, it's time to wake up. Resting and floating these last few years have been hard, but necessary. Interesting, endearing and torturous.

Time to step through the looking glass.

. . . . . . . . .
time to step through the looking glass now
the wind pushes me forward now
sweet rest is a memory
now i step up and act
now stretch, take control
happy, hopeful
i grow now
stronger
now
.........

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Transient

"My recovery from manic depression has been an evolution, not a sudden miracle." ~ Patty Duke

...when I'm high on life, i can look back on the lows and scoff at them. so now that I'm in a low, (yes, they can come on that quickly) I am looking back at the highs to remind me that this mood is a transient state. my life is still beautiful, even when covered in gray...

p.s. it has taken almost the entire day to crawl up to this point. maybe next time it will be easier.

~~~
when life takes me high,
the lows seem alien.
when the winds sigh,
sadness and dejection,
manic dreams die.
memories give me aspirations,
of beautiful rays,
even in shades of gray.
~~~

Friday, February 18, 2011

Magic

"I'm not a prophet or a stone-aged man, just a mortal with a potential of a superman. I'm living on." ~  David Bowie

So. I've come to the conclusion that these extreme moods and emotions are not a curse. They are a gift. A magic power. With any super-human power comes responsibility. I should take care of myself and learn to use my powers for good rather than self-sabotage.

Fervid sensitivity.
Is it such a curse?
Or a gift?  

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Valentine

"Certainly tears are given to us to use." ~ Loretta Young

...someone gave me a present
   beautifully wrapped...
ribbons, bows, sparkles,
   confetti, tissue paper...
...extravagant and tempting
   as i opened the box...
...my breath escaped and
   the most beautiful lace...
...crushed to dust
   tragedy bore itself inside of me...