Monday, March 21, 2011

The Price is High

"I've overcome neglect and deprivation, abandonment and abuse." ~ Tatum O'Neal

When you've compromised your own values and judgments for the sake of keeping an attachment and when they've left you anyway, the anger is mixed with fear and then with shame. What makes it even worse is that in your rational brain you know your reaction is way over the top to what has actually occurred, but the pain and the fear latch onto something so deep, so buried in the core of you that you have so little control over it. You can't let it take you to that abyss you've spent a lifetime building fences around. If your not careful, if you stop resisting the pull, you will fall in and you could lose yourself completely.

Sell your finger and sell your toe,
the sweetheart spoke.
The price is high,
smiling good-bye.

Do I need this finger, this toe,
the question's told.
Anger, fear, shame,
are all to blame.

Missing a finger and a toe,
you're led below.
Clawing, bleeding,
life is reaching.


7 comments:

  1. "Ouch!", she said in recognition. :)

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  2. giving little by little just what do you have left?

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  3. Appropriate analogy...someone like that really does carve you up, bit by bit. And of anger, fear, shame...the last is the one most important to get rid of first. There is no shame in being a decent person and having someone take advantage of you or hurt you. No one deserves that. (Fear and anger generally fade with time, but shame seems to stick around and is corrosive.)

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  4. You guys are great. Thank you.
    ~ Ouch is right Teresa
    ~ ty Debra, Tess
    ~ Brian, I was in relationship that left little of me when I finally left. I hope to never have to learn that lesson again.
    ~ li, shame is the hardest. it's anger turned inward and very hard to dislodge.

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  5. well said. i agree - shame seems to creep into the deep, dark crevices.

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